As I began the blog part of the goal was to give insight into the thought process a leader like me can go through. While I did not come into being a pastor kicking and screaming, I also was not the kid in the class room hopping up and down with his hand wildly waving in the air yelling, “Pick me, pick me!!” It was a simple yes…simple but still with a knowing of what could lie ahead…great fun and excitement…great pain, mixed with tears. It is just how it is and Barb and I knew it but could still say yes…some reservation but yes the none the less.
You see, while it is so exciting to see new faces come and join the fellowship, it is painful to see some go…leave. People leave for lots of reasons; many in our fellowship have had to move to find employment, to begin a career and a family. Some have taken on new roles at other church bodies and others...well they have reasons...Some good reasons and understandable…but also still hard. The Church is unique in the way it is made up and the NT has many descriptions of what the church is like…It is a family, a community, a body, etc. Paul says in Romans 12 “so in Christ we who are many form one body, and each member belongs to all the others.” Think about that for a moment or two…this speaks of connectedness and belongingness (is this even a word?) When I said yes to Jesus I not only connected to Him I was joined to the body…His body…the Church. And I love the Church, actually we love the Church, Barb and I.
And I know it is Jesus’ Church and He can move people as He sees fit but that does not make it easier because we are not connected just through gifts and callings…we are called to love each other… Verse 9 “Love must be sincere…10 Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves.” Maybe I am strange but I cannot love a person and be disconnected from them, I am connected…at the heart…forever. So I know I will never adjust to saying good bye…because I am afraid if I did adjust it would mean I quit loving and I cannot afford to do that.
Barb and I do have a huge Kingdom heart so we know God does move some of His children to strengthen another part of the Body, and we do know that some have to move to provide for their families and we also know some just move…and it all feels pretty much the same. If we are going to receive others who come our way with open arms and love, acceptance and forgiveness then we also know we will say good bye to others…still…
I realize I have always given my heart away quickly, maybe too quickly, but it is how I am wired nevertheless. Even as a kid or young adult, I connected at the heart very quick…it is good for my role as a pastor, I think, but I have to realize not everyone connects like I do. So not everyone will feel what I feel…which also is a good thing I think.
So, I l know this may seem like a bit of a downer but it is good for some of you to read how a regular guy is wired…it isn’t a downer at all. It is life. It is the Church. It is what I said yes to.
Bill
I think that is exactly how we are to think Bill and again thnaks for your thoughts and your time spent this effort. I think it is very meaningful to here what goes on in regular peoples heads. First it encourages and second it sheds light on how it is to think as a servant.
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